By Jasper Clifford-Smith

UC Berkeley Riots.

Free speech is now an antiquated concept on university campuses. Women threatened with rape by masked leftists. Teenagers beaten. People run over. Property damaged. All because someone who isn’t even of the far right (Milo Yiannopolous) dared to book a talk..

 

Malcolm Turnbull’s Body language.

 

Turnbull on 7.30 proved how shit a liar he was, even while he admitted basically buying his last election. In an embarrassing interview for not only himself, the country and anyone with a basic understanding of the mechanics of body language, Turnbull looked not just like a guilty man but also a man who knows how bad a job he’s doing running the country. Our intel reckons Bishop will be PM by Easter.

 

Trump’s Bullshit

He’s looking less presidential by the day, somehow. The Surkov-esque ‘confuse and conquer’ strategy employed by Steve Bannon can only get you so far. You need a leader with some diplomatic nous to pull it off. Trump is no Putin. Putin has been up there for 17 years but I wouldn’t give Trump 17 months before the weight of the job turns him into the kind of orange husk you’d only see at a Halloween party.

 

Clean Coal

(Video from 2015)

It’s an oxymoron. Josh Frydenberg doesn’t look like he’s clever enough to even be trolling with this one. We have boundless desert, let’s fill it with solar panels and power the universe.

 

Theresa May

Flying from Trump to Erdogan doesn’t make you look strong, it makes you look like you’re desperate to get strong men on your side to protect you from a Brexit you don’t believe in.